Being real with them & Slowing down
Parents are very often blamed but not trained…..
In a very fast paced world it seems like we become parents overnight. Without any training or conceptual understanding of how to rase children on a psychological and emotional level, we go about doing out best but often become very hard on ourselves when things dont seem to be working out perfectly.
1. Did you ever sit down with your parents and have discussions about where your family values came from or what their approaches were to raising you and your siblings?
2. Did you sit down with your partner before you conceived or gave birth and discuss how you would approach parenting… soft… hard… both?
” It is so common in my line of work to see parents who feel absolutely attached to having to ALWAYS know what to do. Because if it’s your child then you should know right?…… Wrong as far as P.E.T see’s it!
One of the parenting myths that P.E.T demystifies early on in training is the belief that once we become parents we must be become like ‘gods’ and not behave or be seen as normal people by our children.
Our language and behaviour often indicates that we can handle everything and should be accepting all the time or else we are bad people/parents.
This is way too much pressure if you ask me.
P.E.T teaches you why this is actually very damaging to children and creates confusing beliefs about the world. Its scientifically impossible to be accepting all the time as day to day, minute to minute our emotions are changing. As parents we should feel more than open to sharing this with our children.
Slow down… don’t be so hard on yourself and get some skills that make you feel confident in your communication style.
This way you don’t have to randomly guess what to say or do and hope for the best you have a calm confidence that your skills are encouraging the best growth in them and happiness in you. Its so rewarding and very refreshing!